Mr. Grooism

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December 30, 2003 - 8:21 p.m.

I Donít Know Yet, IÖ

ÖHavenít Figured Out What To Call ThisÖ

Öbecause I have absolutely no idea what to write about today. I canít post a Grooism every day, figure one or two a week tops, unless I start screwing up often enough to post one every day, hee hee!

So Iím just going totally freeform and seeing where my little typing fingers take me. Perhaps a little free association will get me started, hmmm?

Thereís a stapler in front of me, woohoo, fascinating. Stapler, stapler, Liíl Black Swingline, this is soooo not going anywhere, huh? Iím determined not to pause for too long and just keep typing until inspiration hits me! Pause, paws, hey, did I ever mention that Iím turning into a little old lady?

True, I am!

Sort of.

Although this is not the sort of thing I usually do, since August Iíve been feeding the stray cats in my backyard!

(Speaking of My Backyard, hereís a link to another mostly sane gent who enjoys feeding strays! And yeah, Iím going freeform but that doesnít mean I wonít come back, clean this up a bit, add links and italics, and edit, edit edit! )

Anyway, I live in a two family apartment that is actually just a two person apartment, since I live alone and my downstairs neighbor is an elderly woman who also lives alone. Mrs. D. also happens to be my sisterís mother-in-law, and I help her out where I can. Mostly she just wants me to buy the too-heavy-for-her 2 liter soda bottles or pick up some lottery tickets; until recently she always preferred to do her shopping herself by walking to the local bodega.

Back in August Mrs. D. fell and broke her kneecap, and has since been through the ringer, enduring knee surgery, too-much hospital time recuperating, physical therapy in a sort of nursing home, then more hospital time due to blood sugar instability and heart problems! Here it is December 30 and she only just got home to her very own bed for the first time a couple of days ago!

Anyway, when she first injured herself I promised her Iíd take up feeding the stray cats in the backyard for her, she worries so much about them I figured it was the least I could do!

Now, it always kind of bothered me that she just kind of opened her back window and threw the food out, but even before her knee injury she couldnít make the trip to the backyard every day, so I just put up with it.

However, I was uncomfortable with the idea of just dumping food out the window myself, so I set up bowls outside and went around back every morning to feed them properly.

Mrs. D. liked to cook them eggs every morning in addition to giving them bologna, pasta and cat food, so I figured, what the hell, I make myself eggs every morning (yes I am one of those Atkins freaks, 70 lbs lost in 3 years, woohoo!!! ) I can easily throw a couple of eggs on for the cats too, itís good for them, right? But sorry, no bologna or pasta, I have my standards!

Well, at first the cats kind of annoyed me, because they would bolt like I was some sort of evil commie mutant hellspawn, just one look at me and they were gone! Slowly they started to associate my arrival with food, so theyíd creep closer and closer while I was filling their bowls, only to flee in panic if I turned and looked at them!

The Black Cat I refer to as Scarface, since he/she/it has had a divot of fur removed from the side of his/her/its head, In keeping with the movie title theme, I call the Grey Cat Monty Python And the Holy Grail , ok, well, actually just Monty for short.

Over time Scarface and Monty came to trust me, and now occasionally Monty will even rub against my legs while Iím scooping out the Friskiesô and scrambled eggs. Rarely he/she/it will even let me pet pronouns-here a little bit, but I still donít think theyíll ever suffer my presence when Iím not actively feeding them.

Since Mrs. D. is now home but still not terribly mobile, I told her Iíd keep feeding the cats for her, at least until she feels up to doing it herself. She rather dejectedly admitted her family has talked her out of caring for the strays at all, she agrees theyíll survive without her!

Of course they will! Iíve noticed that Scarface and Monty range far indeed, and I know of three other neighbors who leave them food! So this means I can now stop feeding the strays, right?

WellÖ

I do have a bit of a stockpile of cat food at this point, so I may as well keep feeding them until itís gone.

And when the stockpile is gone? Hell, who knows, I may just keep feeding them anyway, I really donít know. Iíve kind of grown to enjoy it.

See what I mean? I have turned into a little old lady!!!

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