Mr. Grooism

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March 23, 2004 - 5:29 p.m.

Thirteen and a Half Things�

March 2!!! MARCH 2!!!* I can�t believe it�s been three weeks since I last blogged!!! Man, I owe you guys about a case and a half of Campbell�s Cream of Mushroom Soup!

*UPDATE! Thanks to Kevin Walsh for noticing I originally wrote May 2
instead of March 2. Did I err?

Well, since I have no good excuse for my absence, I figure I can at least cook up a few bad ones, thirteen and a half to be exact! Here without further fanfare is my list of

Thirteen and a Half Things��
That Have Kept Me From Blogging
For Three Freaking Weeks!

1. I was busy stalking the Verizon �Can You Hear Me Now� dude with a nice, flat flounder for his annoying mug! �Can you hear m-� WHAP!!!
2. I spent the whole time auditioning for American Survivor (What do you mean that�s not the name of the show? I was told my singing was perfect for a deserted island! I was even told to sing Far, Far Away! )
3. March is International Nap Month!
4. The dog ate my keyboard!
5. I was attacked by three hundred crack KAOS assassins with submachine guns! Uhhh, thirty KAOS troopers with truncheons? Would you believe a Little Old Lady with a pointed stick?
6. Kryptonite!!! Aaarrrggghhh!!!
7. I Forgot!
8. �It wasssn�t me, it wasss The Presssciousss!!!�
9. PogoHockey Semifinals (Go Bouncers!!!)
10. Morning Sickness. And Evening Sickness. Afternoon Sickness too.
11. I�ve been busy busy busy looking all over for Weapons of Mass Destruction, and I�m closer than ever to finding the pesky things! Now pass me my plastic pail and shovel, time to get back to work!
12. Can�t post a thing until my new internet provider, godot.com,* is finished setting up my account. Any minute now�
13. I was unable to post bail.
13.5. Three-headed alien gorillabees descended�

*It occurred to me after I wrote this that I should check and see if there is a real godot.com. Perfect! You get automatically shunted to another website whenever you try to get there!

Anyway, it�s all true, I swear! Seriously, its doubtful I�ll ever be able to maintain a daily pace, I usually just want to collapse when I get home from work, but I will do my best to post close to every other day. Deal?


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